Saturday, January 16, 2010

Not ready

This morning I was not ready to open the curtains, and discover that the garden was green: but I did. It was still covered in white when I went to bed. Now there are a few tiny patches of snow, but most of the garden is just very, very wet.

Yesterday I was not ready to settle my remaining parent into a care home: but I did. It is clearly the right place, but I feel this is the kind of thing I should be doing in my 50s, not now. I felt a bit like I was letting my baby start at playgroup, with all the worries of whether they would look after them.

On the way home, I bought a magazine (not a craft one, a general woman's magazine) and a packet of ginger biscuits (it seemed more indulgant then chocolates) and did nothing useful all evening.


Sew Create It - Jane said...

((hugs)) Penny...sounds like you've had a tough day. It can't be easy seeing a parent into a care home, but I'm sure at some level there must be a sense of relief to know your parent will be well looked after. Take care and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

P.S. I was shocked too to see ALL the snow was gone the morning! Boy that was quick!

Dormouse said...

Oh Penny, that must have been so hard. My Dad is showing signs of dementia so I forsee this in my not so distant future too.

I'll be thinking of you.

Penny said...

Thanks for the comments - it was hard. However, my parents moved out of my childhood home a few years ago: if they hadn't this would have been a real wrench, as opposed to a step on a journey already started.

scarletti said...

A big hug for all those moments while the changes still feel new and not yet sitting right. xx

nannypoeme said...

A magazine, tea and ginger biscuits cures most things, including un-readiness.
Oh dear, poor you, about your parent, it must feel like a shite thing to do, but, you'll know they are looked after and, most of all, safe where they are. Thinking of you.

tea and cake said...

i don't know where nannypoeme came from, but it was me what wrote it!